I'm On Fire

Damn Otto Titsling!

I woke up this morning and left my cool to the skin, soft sheets. I'm burnt! I mean red and in odd places! The tops of my feet, my legs (both front and back) the back and front of my thighs, my whole back, the back of my neck, my underarms, forearms, my face, and my ass! Yes, my ass is burnt! Now I'm going to have that skunk look going on (women who go to the tanning bed, you know exactly what I'm talking about!) And I spent the morning trying to cover up with make-up the little thin line from my eyes to my temple from the sun goggles.

When Otto made the over-the-shoulder boulder holder, he did not keep in mind that women would sometimes lay out in the sun and try to catch themselves on fire!

This should be an interesting flight this morning. No one better sit by me and no one better touch me or their lives will be in danger.

This is what happens when I go to the tanning bed like normal after my workout,and then go lay outside for a while by the pool.

*Puts on stupid hat*

I guess I should wear this for the day!