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June 24, 2005

Pest Control

I saw this on my counter when I came home yesterday:

Your apartment has been serviced by Home Pest Control, Inc. You can help control roaches by disposing of all grocery bags and cardboard boxes. Important: Also disposes of any dead roaches. Roaches may be carrying eggs or capsules. One capsule contains a minimum of 24 roaches and a maximum of 48 roaches. Thank you, we appreciate your business.

Now this ticks me off for a couple of reasons. I did call and leave a message to the main office of the apartments that I needed my place sprayed. I specified that I especially needed my pack patio and storage area sprayed.

They never told me when they were coming which pisses me off. First of all, my place is a complete mess! No joke! I would be embarassed for my best friend to walk in here right now. I still haven't unpacked from vacation, I have boxes scattered of stuff I'm trying to go through, haven't taken out the trash. I'd like to clean up before someone comes in going through my place.

Secondly, and most importantly, I have a dog. A small dog. I want to be here if you are entering my home. First because she doesn't know you. You are some weird person entering her home. I will not be held responsible for anything she does to your dumb ass. Second, and again most important. SHE IS A SMALL DOG. If she happens to sniff or lick the shit your spraying and get sick or die, I will hunt you down and make you consume the nastiness you are spraying in my home!

And this note?? Don't they have a follow up service to come take care of the dead carcasses? Now mind you, the problem I'm having is not roaches, or "Palmetto Bugs" as they are called here. I'm having other critters. I don't know what they are and I don't know what they do, but they are coming into my home and freaking me the f*ck out!

And this note acts like I'm going to have no problem cleaning up a dead roach. Wrong answer! They scare me just as much when they are dead, then when they are alive! I'll be pulling out the trusty vacuum if I see anything. And if I start growing a farm of bugs in there, the thing will go in the trash. I don't care. I need a new one anyway!

Anyone can come spray a house! But can they clean up the mess they left behind??

Posted by Sissy at June 24, 2005 10:12 AM

I can't stand roaches but
even worse; silver fish.

I freak at silver fish. UGH.

Posted by: Rachel Ann at June 24, 2005 10:34 AM

Sissy - you hit on the #1 reason I love vacuum cleaners :-)

Posted by: Harvey at June 24, 2005 01:15 PM

"This note is to inform you that your apartment has been serviced by INTRUSIVE PEST REMOVAL. To avoid having roaches, try not to be such a slob. We noticed that your underwear wasn't organized very well, and roaches enjoy hiding in messy lingerie. After an extensive examination and sniffing of your thongs, we have found them pest free. No need to thank us, it's all a part of the job..."

Posted by: Graumagus at June 24, 2005 07:36 PM