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June 27, 2005

Fortune Cookies

I love good Chinese food. But it is oh so hard to find.

But one of my favorite things about Chinese food is the fortune cookies!

GEVIV posted his fortune from this weekend.

But he missed the most important part.

After reading your fortune, you should follow it with the phrase in bed.

So let's use GEBIV's for example:

Your emotional nature is strong and bed.

My fortune from my first night in my first apartment after ordering Chinese (that still hangs on my fridge):

Wishing you the very best of luck in the many years to bed.

Here are a few more I googled:

To be mature is to accept bed.

All your hard work will not pay bed.

Find release from your cares have a good bed.

Your future is as boundless as the lofty bed.

Someone is speaking well of bed.

Do you remember any of your fortunes?

Posted by Sissy at June 27, 2005 09:16 PM

My favorite fortune cookie story was about 8 years ago... one of the guys I worked with at the time was recently divorced and flirting with me quite a bit. We'd gone to lunch together to the food court at our nearby mall, and gotten Chinese (obviously).

At the end of the meal, we read our fortunes aloud. Mine said "You will be fortunate in everything you put your hand to..." At which Lance shot me a wicked grin and raised his eyebrows. I could see him mentally adding the words "in bed" to my fortune and processing the result.

I retorted "Calm down, Lance. It didn't say YOU would be fortunate in everything I put my hand to."

Posted by: songstress7 at June 27, 2005 09:42 PM

My mom once got a fortune that said:

"You will be hungry again soon - order take out now."

She had that one up on the fridge door untill the ink faded off it.

Posted by: GEBIV at June 27, 2005 09:46 PM

Instead of "in bed" we say "between the sheets". Same result, though....

I can't remeber any off hand, but I can remember laughing at them.

Posted by: Amy at June 27, 2005 10:44 PM

The only one I remember is "Stick with your wife".

Wait... that was from the Simpsons.


Posted by: Harvey at June 28, 2005 08:26 AM

OK, I had to start over. Darn thing wouldn't let me link a story about 110 people winning Powerball using fortune cookie numbers. Maybe I need to eat more Chinese food...

Posted by: Jody Halsted at June 28, 2005 09:47 AM

I had one that said, "You would make a good lawyer." What the hell kind of fortune is that?

Posted by: Toluca Nole at June 29, 2005 06:32 PM